A Foodie Son Returns for Mom's Day
After 5-plus years in Japan, he's obsessed with the vegan fare at Trader Joe's
From the moment my son and daughter-in-law returned to Southern California after 5 1/2 years in Japan this week, they wanted to visit Trader Joe’s.
Despite being jet-lagged after a 10-hour nonstop flight from Osaka and coping with a 16-hour time difference, they were eager to fill a food cart with items that were nonexistent or ultra-expensive in Japan: golden berries, Vegan Spinach & Cashew Ravioli, oat milk (actually Non-Dairy Oat Beverage), freeze-dried strawberries, Impossible Chicken Nuggets.
Aside from visiting family and friends, my son Sam Graham said his major ambition was to “eat every item at Trader Joe’s.” Trader Joe’s, he said, is “maybe my favorite thing about America.”
“What about your parents?” I asked.
“Well, you come in a close second.”
In addition to Trader Joe’s fare, he wants to sample some of the restaurant food he can’t find in Japan—Mexican, Latin American, Middle Eastern, Greek.
Why so obsessed with food, I ask?
“Some people when they travel, they like to see beautiful sunsets and mountains, but I’m more into tasting good things,” he said. “I like beautiful views and such, but I think the best thing to do is to taste things you can’t eat back home.”
In that regard my son probably takes after me. Though I do love a good sunset, I admit I’d be more happy about a great meal, especially one in which I sampled new foods and dishes. I remember several such meals when we visited Sam and his wife, Nagisa Kamae, before the pandemic abruptly cut off travel to Japan in 2020. Amazing sushi, yakitori and, believe it or not, the best hamburgers I’ve ever eaten, made from local farm-raised beef and hand-crafted buns.
After a trip to Trader Joe’s, there are a few thrift shops and 99 Cents Only stores on my daughter-in-law’s radar. She loves the cheap prices and colorful packaging, with bright hues and fun items you wouldn’t find in Japan. It fuels her art— paintings of cute animals, often paired with popular American candies or foods: popcorn, a Nestlé Crunch bar, a cupcake, a sandwich.
It’s almost Mother’s Day and I’m determined to post something relevant to both the holiday and my food obsessions. An interview with my son, in his mid-30s and a kindred foodie, seems appropriate, though he can’t quite fathom why I’m choosing to write about food instead of making some for him.
“Do you have any favorite food memories from childhood?” I ask.
“I think you made pancakes with raisins in them. I remember that,” he says. “Sometimes Nagisa makes pancakes, and I always say, ‘Please put raisins in,’ so it must be some kind of subconscious thing.”
He also remembers oatmeal with brown sugar.
“Didn’t that also have raisins?”
“Yes, often,” I say. “Because my mother served it like that.”
“So it’s multigenerational now. It’s been passed on.”
I tell him that my mother Flora, a native of Glasgow, Scotland, made oatmeal almost every morning for my father and usually for us as well. She called it porridge and made it from the contents of a large cardboard canister of Quaker Oats, the old-fashioned rolled oats variety that took at least 10 minutes from boiling the water to serving the cereal. My mother may have cooked it longer since she preferred it thick and well-salted—probably a legacy of her Scottish roots.
I liked it with brown sugar, raisins and a drizzle of milk. I don’t remember if my father added anything to his, but I know some stewed prunes were usually on the side, along with black coffee (the percolated variety), and occasionally some kippered herring, which we just called kippers. Here’s a link to Traditional Scottish Porridge from The Spruce Eats.
Oatmeal has become trendy in Japan too, Sam says. Even oat milk is becoming a thing.
Since Sam makes oatmeal for himself in Japan, he’s happy with some homemade granola (you can find a link to my recipe here), served with some dried fruits and oat milk—or his grandma’s special dry cereal mix that includes an oaty brand from Trader Joe’s. I’m determined to make some raisin pancakes and some French toast, another of Sam’s favorites, before he and Nagisa head back to Japan.
On this Mother’s Day, we’ll be spending the afternoon with Jeff’s mom, Judy Graham, Sam’s grandmother, who would not be comfortable with my mother’s meat-centric cooking. She’s a vegetarian most of the time, although she does eat fish, so I guess that makes her a pescatarian.
Her husband, Mike Ansell, will grill salmon, veggies and corn for the occasion, and there are sure to be raisins—the chocolate-covered variety—for her son Jeff. They’ll be well-hidden in the pantry so he can’t devour every last one before dinner. We moms know a thing or two about our sons!
Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers, grandmas, stepmothers, foster moms and anyone who is mothering someone (that might even include fathers!). It’s not always easy, but motherhood does have its rewards—especially when you’re lucky enough to see your children again, well and happy, after a long absence!
My mother Flora has been gone now for almost 23 years, but I think of her often, especially when I bake. We had our differences, but we did share that bond. I talked about her in two previous Mother’s Day stories.
You can find the links to them below. There’s also a link to a story by my husband and fellow Substack blogger Jefferson Graham on how to take great Mother’s Day photos—like the one above!
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Loved your post❣️ We really enjoyed their visit the other night. It was hard to believe it had been 5 and half years since they moved to Japan! Belated Happy Mother’s Day!
I loved seeing the photos of your handsome son and beautiful wife.
I also had a Scottish grandmother and we always had salt in our porridge too. It doesn’t taste right without it. Goes well with brown sugar and raisins.